Thursday, November 04, 2004

defensive tactics

grant and i went to bed not talking to eachother last night. it was so stupid too. we had been joking around all night practicing defensive tactics on eachother as we often love to do. and then suddenly the trash talk got too serious and i told him to shut up and then he told me i had just bought myself a whole night of silence. and that was the end. we brushed our teeth and went to sleep. at least tried. i can never sleep if i can't at least touch him. this morning we both stumbled blindly into the bathroom at the same time, saw eachother in the mirror and started laughing. we are such idiots. sometimes the frustration of living here really gets to us and we take it out on each other.
it's sad because i kind of like it here. i have a job that i love. a job that changes as much as i do and that has so much room to grow. i'm finishing school. not that i love school but i love being challenged. it makes me feel smart, which makes me feel good. it isn't cold here. we live 10 minutes from the beach.
but grant really doesn't like it at all. the traffic sucks. there are so many people that it's hard to be alone, but we tend to constantly feel lonely because we don't have many friends. it is hot as a griddle every single day. it rains so randomly all the time. our rent is twice as much as in tallahassee. groceries cost more. both of our families live far away. the public schools are not so good so raising kids here is not an option.
so what do we do? we have to be here almost 2 more years. i am definitely in favor of optimism.

No comments: